a girl..me in a much younger version..hehehe

a girl
Originally uploaded by rika_rika.

envy the gurl..look like she hvg all the fun w the sea..the wind & someone take her photo..

2day i feel like so bodoh lagi lah being baik ati again..
if i know lah i would be so tired..
i wouldnt agree to replace the person..
just b4 the meeting a student was asking me

whether i be out..

of course lah..but iif i will pun..i dont want to bwk u..

hated myself..loved myself..

i was looking at the mirrow..

gosh..my arm like so big..so hidous..

huarghh..wanna lose weight..

wanna lose weight so badly..

fat..fat ..go ..away

i gain like 2 kg..huarghh..hated myself..hated myself..
yup...i ate like crazy the past days..might be coz of the tense & the soon.period..
no wonder..like everything getting bloated..
big tummy..big boob..big butt..
all fat..huarghhhhh...

------------------------

kerja still tak siap lagi..
benci2..

-------------------

2 days more nak balik..
tak sabar nye

-------------
thank god..
yesterday u manage to settle all my bill..
rasa release a bit..

a friend in need, is a friend indeed

i wanna back Kl..so bad this past few days..due to the tense..the pressure..the depression that i facing..
but wait..its KL that come to me!!..
by suprise(tak sgt pun sbb dulu i used to this suprise coming)
1st ever my friend come from kl..
yg lain bila lagi?...
come lah..come..
at camp..that a lots of place to vist..to enjoy..
teringin nak bwk korang gi pantai..
where the sand...the beach..the air..the breeze such a beauty..such paradise(taklah sgt..tp boleh lah kan..to my eyes..)hehehhehe
normally me myself sorang je yg dok snapping..dok guling2 kat beach..
w the arrival of korang..adalah geng..hehehehehe..
geng snaping2..geng gelak2..geng guling2..
thanks for coming dinda..kinda down this past day..but i really glad that u come..

remember my said
"if i not coming to Kl..KL is coming to me.."

how have u been ? im fine thx.
sorry i couldnt be online with u tat day aftre i said i will be back after 2 hours.
i was watching football la.
y u so baikhati huh...be a lil garang sikit la.
so u want me to be online with u so tat u can gaduh2 with me isit ;p
i make u laugh ru sure ?
i will always tease n make u geram tat u wanna cekik me..betul or tak !!!

anyway u have a great day ahead..n u take care.

cheers..

---------------

to gadoh w u is the 1st things in my mind when u be online..
hahahhahah.
coz i get to practise to be garang..
coz i laugh like no one business..
coz someone listening to my craps..
coz i got to hear sweet talk & gatal voice(this gatal is according to msian version not sg OK!!!)
coz some one always said that im a supermodel..
coz that some one make me smile despite of my rough day at work
coz at the end of the day..i feel good about myself..

TQ for listening!

i really need to be motivate..

how to lose more weight..
how to be patient w the student..
how to sabar tak balik umah..
how not to miss something which is not really wont be mine..

sometime i think im really so ungrateful in life.. ..

the reason Y

me ganti this person coz she went to meeting..
my 1st class on monday..serious..ive no mood at all..
luckily..ive fun w this class though im not totally prepare for it..

then when my real class is..the class is totally SUCK!!!!
honestly..i just HATED them..
dah lah tak buat kerja..
dah lah buat kerja cam sial..
geram nye..
dgn emotional..dgn tak nak participate in class..
dgn gedik..dgn pasif nye..
honestly..this is not my very fav class..
i just dont know Y..
they dissapointed me..
all the 25 student..
might be coz of me..coz im so tak reti teach..
might be my skill r so bad..
might be im bored...
but the ive fun w the morning class...
honestly..
i just feel down..feel demotivate w them..the rubbish student..
i know i cant said it but Y..
other can give me that kind of cooperation..
but them r just pemalas...
i know i cant said this bad word..but im so depresss here...

can u believe that im so eager for the school holiday..
im so eager the class is over..
im so eager i no class time..
im so eager weekend..
so that i can rest in peace..
in harmony..
to gain my confidence..my strength..my motivation to work..

its not only me i believe encounter such feeling
my camp mate also face the same trauma..but they here more lama than me..
gosh..its just been like 4 month here..but i complaining a lots..

i know..i realise...
huarghhhh..at this very moment all i can think of
balik kl..
gi shop at BB..shop kasut..shop bj..
jalan2 at Ptlg street..
swim..
jog( i hated myself like im gaining lots)

here i make sure that in order to remain alive..sane..
i surf net..i blog..
i keluar dr camp.at least a pasar pun jadik..
my room must be clean...
& i try to be least contact w the student..when i in my hostel..

dear god..
please help me..
give me motivation to work..
dont ever make me bored..
im might not a great student b4..but i know that im a GOOD one..
a friend of me told me that a great teacher doesnt mean he/she used to be a great A student..
but a one who used to fail..then gain success after lots & lots of hard work..
a one..that had made trial & error in his/her life..
a one.. that start from nothing to a SOMETHING..
a one..that hv prove her/himself to be someone in life..

is this is wat im really good at..
is this wat i really want..
y im so mudah putus asa...
y all is so challeging..

its a bless that..
i meet such a good friend here..not all r that good..
but at least i know that they r the one that i can mengumpat together..
that showed me a lots perangai here..
im learning..& i pray..that i will always breathing & stand still here..

Top Five Signs of Burnout

5. You don't set your alarm anymore because you know your pager will go off before the alarm.
4. You consider 4o hours a week a vacation.
3. Visions of the upcoming weekend help you make it through Monday.
2. Your DayTimer/Work Planner exploded.
1. You think about how relaxing it would be to be in jail right now.

------------------------

that Y u be seeing me w my nikon..clicking non stop..
that y u be seeing me shopping..& window...
that Y u be seeing me..in photo smiling...rather than me in person..
that Y i be online..waiting for someone..Y oh Y..
that Y..i make myself blog..no matter..how hectic my life is..
that Y..i brave myself..stay here..late at night..w the net stuff..
that Y..u be hearing..crying..emailing..grumphy..
that Y..i always..said..i luv u..& i really meant it....

sometime..things in life..happen wout a reason..but is it true?...

it aint how deep u fish..it how u wiggle the worm

Write d name of d thing @ person on the bottom of your shoes & walk on it.

Write it on the toilet paper, and well, you know what to do.

---------------------------------------------------------------

WANT A LIFETIME OF happiness..laughter is the secret!

If you don’t learn to laugh at trouble,
you won’t have anything to laugh at when you grow old.
--Pat McManus

Tips for More laughter in Your Life

Practice laughing 5 min/day. Fake it till you make it.

Look for humor around you--on signs, in people's behavior, on TV, in the newspaper, the things others say, the crazy things that happen to you.--Keep a journal.

Share your embarrassing moments with other people.

Learn to play with things that are serious like work, social issues, money, etc. For example, use word play, silly songs, or develop a comical view of the issue to help you laugh and cope.

Laugh with other people when they laugh.

Wear a smile. It puts you closer to laughing.

Seek out entertainment which makes you laugh.

Amuse yourself with your own sense of humor.

Buy and listen daily to a tape of laughter, a laugh box, or a laughing toy.

Buy mindless toys that make you laugh.

Wear hats that make you laugh.

Cultivate your innate playfulness.

Be creative with fun.

Make sure you have fun.

Give yourself permission to laugh at anything you need to.

Do at least one silly, non-conforming thing a day

my heart say..

i just wanna noted myself that i proud of myself..
not coz others..just for my own pleasure & my motivation..
i remember i was hvg a discussion w my batch mate..
he was kinda down..less motivate w the work..
i do agree w his point..for such..i think this camp environment is just suck..
especially the old people..
im not saying all bad..but sometime..i kinda demotivate w them..
i always pray..that i gonna still be me..not matter wat happen..
if im going to change any..
i hope i gonna do me my own good....
im not really that noble..but i now im good..im decent..

in between..
he was mentioning about life goal..something like it..
like..after ive achieve my dream in life..wat would be next..
am i going to satisfied at that level onle..
wat im gonna do to benefit my environment..
well..it kinda a broad & big issue..but i think ive discuss this somewhere b4..might be the time i still studying..
as for now..my only vision @ goal in life is simply
wanan make me happier..a merrier person..
i wanna people to appreciate me..respect me..& accept me for who i am..
i wanna make people surround me especially my family & dearie friend..happy..
but b4 im gonna make them happy..
i will always wanna put me at the 1st place...
enough of crying..enough of being bulied..enough of being pressure..
i think i deserve great things in life..
god already make plan for each individual..
god might give me the hard way 1st so thatt i can enjoy the sweetest later..
i hope i gonna be strong..be wise..be emotionally stable..
this is my prayer..this is my wish..

TQ..

my saturday at camp:the reason Y..the stuff i done..hoorahhhh!!

w my reliable nikon..my warden friend..w little money..w my twin advise..

w pending work..w mission to lots of rest..

here am i..

spending my weekend here..

so far..ive fun...

pagi pagi my twin already call..

go MT..do facial~my warden mate pay 4 me 1st..

it was a beutification of torture..so sakit!!..especially the dirty blackhead stuff..

i never had any facial treatment b4..& kinda fun also..

pampering urself w this girlie stuff for the sake of beauty..

gosh..not only hard to become gurl..kinda painful & costly..

2 weeks from now..facial stuff more..

i need to get more seroius in this beautification nowadays..hahahha..y aaa..

just for the sake of feeling GREAT about ourself..

pampering myself..& as an appreciation of my stressful life..

me deserve it isnt..

hope good stuff from this experiementation..hahahah..

in between..

send fabric to tailor

(2006 i think i buy & buat lots of bj gomen lah..wat to do..kerja realted)

the private beach..

(i simply luv beach..hv i told everyone like zillion of times..hehehhe..but the beach here is simply remarkable..it just a short distance from my camp..its clean..its so nice..& its totally private..)

pic..pic..pic..& more pic..

model..model..modelling..

now at this moment ..

im waiting for joget2..

surfing..mail stuff..upload pic..

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my stuff..as a reminder

Y i think like i gain weight..

coz of my pant like fit a bit..

coz i dont heavy exercise..

i wanna marah myself..

huarghhhhhh..

y lah..myself so teruk..

ok edd..u need to cruz40..cruz40..

slim..fit & lose more weight..

no fat..no gemuk..

i wanna look good...

just for once..

Have A Tasty Day ..YUMMY!

1 cup Courtesy

1/2 cup Patience

1/4 cup Forgiveness

2 cups Understanding

1 cup Encouragement

2 tsp. Unselfishness

Stir in a pinch of Praise.

Add a dash of Wit and Humor.

Season with Faith and Conf idence ,

Put it in a 16 x 9 pan,

bake on 350° for a Lifetime

and serve with generous portions of Love and Smiles . .

beginner to intermediate photographer :kidS CAPTURE!

i wonder whether this work @ not..hehehhe..seem so cool!

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings,

poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me,
"You're next."

They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

WHO YOU REALLY ARE?...

You are a person who is keeping things to yourself.
You are a bit more choosy on friends and only hangout with those whom you think are on the same frequency.
Your life is not fulfilled.
You are weak in your life and tends to be fragile.
You have high sex drive.
You have a few good friends in your life.
Your last relationship is not a good one and is not memorable to you.
Even when your partner is around you, you will flirt around with others.
You have an average ego.
A humble personality is in you.
You get average bond with your friends.
Your partner is only average in your heart.
Your partner is a very homely and humble person.
You seek your partner whenever you are met with problems.

i just luv thursday & friday coz ive no class at all for the time being..
this is the only day where by i rilex & tenang..
its a great life indeed..hehehehhe

its friday..
punch in..
show face at the room..
meet my small boss..
breakfast..
my room & sleep...
pick up my warden mate children
surf..surf..surf..
hehehhehe


pending work
my schema work..
my everyday activity
my report for the net room..
my filing stuff

tonight
my 1st class at this center..as an eng teacher..
gosh..kinda takut jugak..hope everything is smooth

yesterday!!

my kanda affa BIRtHday!

~i miss to call @ sms yesterday..but i remember this morning...

to cz affa....

may we gonna hv a happy & blessful life for the years to come!!

wanna buy!!

shoes..
facial stuff..make up..facial care..
LAPTOP/note book
byr utang..
buah laici..
camcorder..

bila nak gaji nie...

make me smile..make me touch..how a simple bravery can spark a new life

i was listening to such a beautiful story today..
so..i make it short..

--------------------

since tommorow a festive season..i call upon my old friends
& i came across this no..

"hi..Y no i cal him..he is my old buddy"

so..there was chat & all..it was really fun..as i was really happy to hear his cheerful voice & he does to..

then the magic question

"hv u married..."

"no..i hvnt..i just went thru a rough break up"

"u didnt?..(he sound kinda interested)...that too bad..so that meant u single..& to tell u the truth..im also single.."

"i wanna tell u something that i suppose to tell u b4..but i didnt had the courage..so here am i..

i like u..i fall into u..since the day we met"

i was so speechless..
& the ending is we get married afterward & live ever after

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kinda like fairy tales right..
fairy tales pun happen in real life..
it is the story of one of my friend here at camp..
i think she deserve the guys..
gosh..how i wish i gonna had that happy ending soon..

ugly duck to gorgeous swan..

i spent time teach my warden mate how to create his own blog..
& he is so excited to learn one..hehhehe..
bukan susah pun kan..macam terror lak me
me also..learn dulu from the basic..ask there ask here & still learning....
the warden mate sungguh wanna know my blog..hahahha..
no way..i wanna let people here know my santuanary kutuk place..

------------------

a jauh friend call me yesterday..
she kinda desperate to look for job..a permanent one..
& she was totally suprise when i reply her sms

"i call u back kay..coz ive student to handle..im at camp"

she terus call me & ask me how i can dapat this position..honestly the way she ask totally irrated me..& persoalkan my credibility..i was really2 upset!..
then i make a conclusion that she under stress..from family especially..

im happy here..
im really bless here..
though sometimes things not running my own ways..
but i know i do hv GREAT family & reliable friend to cry upon their shoulder..

so..i dont give a damn about her..
i deserve these..
dont ever look down upon me!

i play this this "feel good games" in my class

s-smile always

u-understanding

h-hyperactive

a-ambitious

i-intelligent

d-different

a-amuzing..

name ur good character based from ur names..hahhah..

& this mine!

pinky skirt..how adorable..i like this capture!

Disheveled from her nap the ballerina found herself wrinkled, and missing a sock.
Originally uploaded by Sdgard.

wat to teach..ayoo..no ilham..
hv to teach creative..lots of games..
camne nak attractive sttudy participate in my class..
how to be EXTRA>>>>MORE patient..

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http://reviews.cnet.com/Notebooks/2001-3121_7-0.html?tag=cnetfd.dir

for my reading!!

value added job describtion..the ghostbuster..the guard..the angel..despite also penakut..but if all afraid..sama nak keep eyes on the gurls

lack of sleep..few hours..damn i look so miserble...
scare yeah..sapa lah tak takut..
but if i tak berani sapa wanna jaga them..

w class..w sem..w camp pass..
i overcome it..
yet i couldnt stand it anymore...
lari..cabut gi crown parade..after all settle..
i need to see new face..new environment..
i succeed..

if kat home lah..hahhaha
byk tmpt i jalan..but wat to..
the anak rantau

if anyone read this..just to let u know..i stay up..im so sleepy..im tired..
my mind totally blank..

god..praise to u..that i be strong..i dont get any mc..
i wanna smile..wanna laugh..wanna talk..but i couldnt..

on the brighter side:
got adip..
settle my camp pass..

how i wish i hd mORE time to sleep & exercise

send budak home..
thils's son birthday..
w nudge at wed..
w dinda & kanda super..
w dinda tgk house
w dinda at times..pic..makan..little shopping...

damn tired!!!
yet..ive fun here..
life completely different from camp..

it gonna be raya soon!!
cepatlah gaji....

i gain like 1.5KG..
HURAGHHHHH!!
adip & xecal just dapat...
cepat2..
u must LOSE WEIGHT..
im really2 afraid bj tak muat..
i dont want it happen..
hv to cruz40...
have to..hv to..

i gonna LOSE weight..
i gonna stay FIT..
i gonna be SLIM
i gonna be pretty..
i gonna stay sane..& happy!!

cepat cuti!!!!

ive tired weekend..
i force myself come here..to upload pic..to do stuff..
as esok this room gonna be pack..
me think esok aje that ive time for myself..
tell myself..
dont let others ruin it ok..
ive to do my ERRAND!!!!

the earth & the sky..

me:the beach..the sand..the sea..me so HAPPY!!

ive strong believe in friendship..TQ gurls!

i no feelimg except the tiredness

twinkle little star
Originally uploaded by Eric Setiawan.

nice song:I'll Be Over You

only ur cute pictures..
esp with the one which has suhaida..

--the hidden & the unknown

"y not u tell me s*h**da?"

i work here coz i need money
i wanna a permanent..
i wanna a career..

tuhan tu maha adil
maha kaya..maha berkuasa..maha bijaksana

ada hikmat di setiap tindakan di ambil..
ada reason napa u been hurt..
ada cause Y people not online..
ada reward di setiap penantian..

"God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with Him. "
"Y not 6 month times..we see how its goes"

i was out w my warden mate..
its was FUN..damn those nice shoes..
i spoted 3 kind actually under prima*era brand..nice!!!so lovely

evening time tenis was change to pengkalan log..
due to the event that run at the hostel..
so me hd this seafood stuff & it was really YUMMY!!

Y oh Y on earth i must hv this kind of feeling..
i hated to mengharap..berharap..
waiting & waiting...

i miss shopping..huargH!!!!

i mad w myself coz when i not w the net..not infront pc..i get tons of idea..
really suck man..

i lost idea to write..

i miss home..miss my kl..my faiz danial..miss mummy..miss EVERYONE!!!!!!
cant wait friday!!!

i MISS HOME>>MISS window shopping!!

..miss my KL>>

nak BALIK!!!!!

my capture during adha..