i was viewing old picture of ME!!
im fat..boys..was i fat..
i cant believe that me..im so like..gemuknya..
i DONT WANT TO BE FAT AGAIN!!
that my promise to myself..
i wanna feel good about myself
i wanna be happy & LUV myself..

DONT want to be fat..
WANNA CRUZ & slim & lose weight..

so..for the coming 2 month holiday..
gonna be EXTREMELY STRICTLY to myself
GONNA GO JOG as i used to do went i was in NET~my santuanary park
GONNA GO FOR SWIMMING
GONNA GO for window shopping
LEss eat..MORE EXERCISE!!!!
GONNA SKIPPING for 200X perday~basic..
GONNA EAT BALANCE & plenty of water..
gonna be VEGETARIAN as possible as i can..
DONT WANT TO EAT LATE AT NIGHT
GONNA CLEAN my room & organize my stuff~my book,my toys..my wardrobe..

basically~~reminder for myself!!!
I DONT WANT TO GET FAT>>LOSE WEIGHT till balance weight>>>45kg!!!

__________________________________

i used to hv long silky black hair..
nice....
i used to luv that hair..luv it coz its natural..its original
gosh..that hair..thank god i did took lots of pic b4..

"hey, do u keep long hair
u will look nicer with a shoulder length hair
keep tiil ur back level
with some curls at the end
u will look super cute..with such a hairstyle
highlight a lil brown
so aftre evaluating ur face..tat hairstyle will look nice
wear some pastel colur dress
so dont cut ur hair ok
aftre tat..u can keep long hair rite"

*****hehehehe:long hair again..im not so commited to such anymore..*****
----------------------------------------------------------

revenge on shopping spree

i couldnt believe myself that i'd spent almost rm 500 on this month just for make up...
WOW!!its so expensive to be a girl..thank god that the only make up that i know to apply/use is only lipstick...
things that i bought from the 2 warehouse sale:
4 Di*r lip ~~RM 100
4 lan**me lip~~ RM 100
jad*re perfume~~RM 120
3 Di*or face blotter~~RM 45
3 Di*or pensil sharperner~~rm 6
-----------------------------------------------
the GIRLS:me..twin..cousin..& noni
~crave about sale
~luv to pose/take picture~we spend RM 6 for photo machine which is really fancy!.
~luv shopping,luv being pretty..luv being girls

ME:luv being single..not attach to any..life is GREAT!
twin:engaged
nana:taken
noni:bachelor
----------------------------------------------
for the 1st time i bought myself a short skirt..2 by the way.hehehhehe...i think its nice coz really hard lately to find myself a good dress.since im short..i've to opt wering things that me a little taller..pants not skirt.
----------------------------------------------
noted that WEIGHT:51 KG..
dated 29/10/05
MISSION:MAINTAIN & LOSE MORE!!!!
----------------------------------------------

they went for warehouse sale today..huarghh..nak shopping gak!

my 1st assemble here at camp..
gosh..i wasnt prepared at all..tau tau je, i need to give a speech..
infront almost 500 student & teacher..
YYYYYY??
dont know what i rumble about??
my hand r so shaking..so cold..
word utters so bad..
huarghh....
thank god lah i wear pretty decent kebaya & my glossy lipcare..

---------------------------------

god has answer my prayer..
salary in already..
its a blessing..alhamdullilah..

----------------------------------

i get this from an intersting blog that i read.she is goooooood..she LUv taking picture..
--------------------------------------
the world i take for granted

i use to think that nothing is perfect.
thirty years I have been taught by all that surrounds me.

the air i breathe,
the sun i soak,
the ground i walk upon,
the water i feel,
the words i hear,
the drama i see,
the anger i taste,
the courage i seek,
the confessions i speak,
the truth i bleed,
the disappointment i meet,
the guilt i avoid,
the love i speak,
the life i lead.

I used to preach that there is no picture perfect in a painting.
There is not a single day that I try to prove to myself.
There is not a single day that I try to prove someone else wrong.
and every single day the world teaches me.
of lessons of love,
of lessons of giving,
of lessons of feeling,
of lessons of seeing,
of lessons of listening,
of lessons of being,
of lessons of asking.

but only a day in a year do i allow myself to learn.
learn that life itself is perfect.
perfect as the day i was born.

__________________________________________
i liked the ways she put in the words..simply but genuine..
life is to be enjoy & be appreciate..
never to be take for granted..

lots of things in life that i did take things for granted..little regret but is never to late to change....

as time will heal the wound
as maturity comes w times
as the right people will come along ur ways
as experience enrich ur life..
as being in LUV is the sweetest things ever

i wanna to enjoy MY LIFE TO THE FULLEST..
being ME not others..
being HAPPY ..being joy..being in luv..

cant wait for friday..nak balik...huarghh..

You may say i am a dreamer, but i am not the only one

If you can imagine it you can create it. If you can dream it, you can become it.

Ward, William Arthur

Luck is when opportunity knocks and you answer.

Anonymous

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams!

Live the life you've imagined.

As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.

Thoreau, Henry David

Your own words are the bricks and mortar of the dreams you want to realize. Your words are the greatest power you have. The words you choose and the use establish the life you experience.

Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich.

Bernhardt, Sarah

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.

Roosevelt, Eleanor

"Dream is not a revelation. If a dream affords the dreamer some light on himself, it is not the person with closed eyes who makes the discovery but the person with open eyes lucid enough to fit thoughts together. "

Dream- a scintillating mirage surrounded by shadows- is essentially poetry. * Michel Leiris

this fella blog

i simply LUV my adi & ida photo pages & i simply LUV the picture,the quality of the services & i simply LUV all the wonderful picture taken by members..
i was viewing my contact~i always does & it is really awaken to see such GREAT capture w realiable services...i wanna the pro account so badly....****promise to myself~~u gonna hv it one day once ur 40kg!!!its the treat!!kay baby~~& came across this fella blog..nice one & his idea kinda same like mine & cool!!!if this fell can achieve his dream..so do i..& i will one day..

7 things to do before I die

~Catch the Trans-Siberian railway from Moscow to Vladivostok. All 9288 kilometres of it. I'm curious to see if my eyeballs would freeze if I stick my head out the window. While I'm on that train, I might as well see Russia. :D
--------------------------------
i did post about places that i wanna to go..not so many people known about this @ if they do might be they not interested to go 2 this places

~Make one room in my house the library. I'll fill it with shelves slowly stock it up with my books over the years. None of that buy-by-bulk business. Stick a sofa in there and hide some Bosé speakers around and we're all set.
--------------------------------
yeah..room for book..for my wardrobe..for my toys..wow..if im born as a billionaire most probably i've 100 @ > room..
currently im checking @ browesing for house..if lah ada RM...gonna buy one but still lots of debt @ payment yg important..soon..if its is bertingkat building..wanna pool & gym & > than 1 parking space..

~Go back to Mekah (for the haj this time) with my folks. They bought my ticket first time around, it's only fair that I return the favour.
-------------------------------------
in my dream places to be realize soon..i've start the things w open my tabung aji acc

~Pay off all debts. Monetary or otherwise.
-------------------------------------
must..& soon..org berhutang nie cepat miskin& might be no credit card at the momert no matter how hopeless im am

~Take the DELE (Diplomas de Español como Lengua Extranjera) exam. That way I'll wave that diploma under their noses and tell people I can legally speak Spanish, even if I make all the grammatical errors that more often than not surface when I speak. I saw the sample exams. Susah gila!
------------------------------------------
dont know what r above but mine study as high as possible..learn new things as much as possible..life is about exploring!!!

~See more of the world. Preferably where I have friends. Besides being able to see them, I can crash at their place. Cheaper.
-------------------------------------------
always been my target..dream..ambition..soon....

~Grow old with someone.
----------------------------------------
i pray..someone that would LUv me as for what i am...

~~"as long as i lived"~~

i think this is really sweet..

utter by gotcha person..

how i wish some one would wish me that..

i

my addiction

i cant live w out my gadgets..my shopping spree..my sinful indulgence ,my toys & my beloved MPV ...plus a reliable internet connection..
from a person who dislike IT @ computer i turn to a person that cant live w out it..
i didnt hv any IT background..so IT buta..& how its really a problem when it come to accomplish job using computerlast time
i recall asking my ex...my family for HELP regard any work use computer..
i remember my 1st mail was yahoo that been tought by my GF at campus.
although im suck using computer(how i cry badly when all my typing dissappear still i acknowledge myself as someone internet savvy.hehheheheh~angkat bakul..
internet is FUN & i enjoy every second of it.
i think that Y kot i being accepted w NET..despite my stupid answer & my so lack knowledge using computer..(but then when i work w NET..there r even 100x moron than me out there...hehehhehehe)

~~~when others didnt give any chance..NET the only one the see my credibility..indeed work w NET..everyday is a pressure..insecure but the experience & the ilmu that i gain cant be trade w any others pleasure in my life..~~~

my so called my crave..my addiction nowadays is in...
"apa nak write in blog"
when i've good things to write normally i ended up w not infront pc~as nowadays work is not related full usage of IT~so i quite frustated when the idea cant be put down immediately..HUARGHHHHH..previous post..asal tense aje..write blog..hahahhahah..kutuk..angry all kat blog..it good anyway for stress release & work w NEt is indeed a perk..( i cant image lah working w an organization for 8-10 hours w out any internet connection)..
as per today also..got GREAT stuff to write...got many things to kutuk2..to release tense & how i as over the moon when the room was empty..but only 4 few min then..ramailah pulak..hated no privacy at all..there r teacher waited to use kot..hahahahahha..now i run to lab lak..

"i should take this pose"
photograpy....my nikon...posing..my picgallery..my ida & adi's page picture..
~how i wish i been sponsor for the account @ the payment will be less cheaper @ miracle along theway..
~how i wish that i've my own laptop 2 upload picture
~how i wish i know how to use all the picture software
~how i wish i hv extra RM to learn photography course @ being sponsor for that.
~how i wish that i can bought myself a video camera & learn to be a good in it..
& the list goes on..

"RM 100 for 4"
cant denied that i LUV sale especially wardrobe..but my latest crave would be like make up..hahahahahhahaha..lipstick..branded names only

"cruz..cruz..cruz"
MY PASSION>>MY DREAM>>MY AMBITION...
47 kg~~~45kg~~~40 kg

"To love without condition...to talk without intention...to give without reason...& to care without expectation...is the heart of true friend..."

me so bad

i need to mark 150 paper....i know yet still i went for window shopping w cousin..
i just cant help myself..bored..felt so empty & i need to cuci mata...
girls will be girls..w loan from emi & nana..i bought myself not 1 but four branded lipstick at a warehouse sale..

"da..kau dont want to buy anything'
"dont think so"

but i cant resist myself from buying the lipstick which totally on sale..4 branded lipstick for just rm 100..damn cheap!..

i admit being girls is so much fun..got to spend..got to shop..got to be pretty..got not to posa..hahahahahah..life is great..i recall im not this type of buying such cosmetic stuff & all the girlie stuff & i never had any pinky stuff before but human tendely to change w its maturity..

I STILL LUV shopping for cloth..luv sale so much..
begin to LUV for shoe & bag
begin to enjoy lipstick(beginner & coz its the only make up that i know how to apply)
long hair?hahhahahah...not yet..still prefer shorter & simple hair..

not able to be online,to blog,to chat,to upload picture..etc
due to the server was down here..
feel so empty..so not me..
gosh!need to hv my own broadband & pc soon..
b4 that...god..i pray to u..please let them payroll bank in my salary asap..

----------------------------------------
accompany my mummy wir bring her student for shopping..
oklah..got to eat for supper for their party
------------------------------------------
im not well today..so weak but force to camp coz got paper..
then became so weak & im not fasting today...
might be due to the weather..hit by rain yesterday
@ the ketumbit @ missing home so bad @ my antibody so bad..
but i gonna make myself heel by today..wanna go home tomorrow
---------------------------------------------
marking the paper which gave me heart attack,tension,dissapointent,frustation..
gosh my fellow student got mark range 40-70 only!
which really bad
nak kata susah..woi!!!!i told them what come out..ask them to read the important page & ask then to read/study hard for the topic plus ask them to give their opinion..its so easy..my mentor said also question so easy..
now what i've to do w the student..mmmmmmm
hv to turture them by next year.hahhahahahah
this she devil is emerging coz u student r so bad..
----------------------------------------------------------------
my room is totally a mess..
my baju hvnt been wash..
got paper to mark(tense..tense)..
got mark to key in
got to see my KJ
got to submit my laporan(how i hated paperwork~all the assignment..hated it!)
hated the MP camp here..i hvnt done my pass..
all the fuss..all the work to be done...
esok gak im going back..yeah!!!!!!!!

You may be only one person in the world,but you may also be the world to one person.

tough question

"below,yg mana not a good conduct in menlayari internet"

a.tidak melayar turun laman-laman web yang berbentuk pornografi

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

student form 1:miss,what is pornografi?

ME:arghh..should i answer..what would be the correct answer..umphhh..lucah..no..its 18sx/18pl/18sg show...understand kan..

taz & me

Again Taz
Originally uploaded by adi &ida.

luv,crave,fanatic about taz so much...

yesterday & today

>>so my weekend here at camp...do lots of event & window shopping & jamuan also.(all so desperate & terpaksanya)..wanna shopping so bad..my eyes set in the hottest bj kerja @ bj raya at a bargain price..yet no money coz no gaji..the money meant to spend to toll & oil & ice blended & kl & swim & etc...

>>my twin ~pity her...nie yg u to totally geram w the fat sibling...siap depa no duit raya for sure!

>>finally the buffet.well food was ok but it just suck i think..not coz i alone but the environment itself..macam lah all the food tak serve lagi & the people hasnt seen any burger at all...& the place was controlling the food.HEI!..it buffet..u cant just sekat the thing...it just turn me off & i didnt get the ice cream also.

>>went to the only hypermarket here were it just SUCK!never ever i been tahan at the counter at kl~of all the shooping mall~i think this just bodoh nye system.what the heck?i dont bother to get malu but irratated w the service..gosh..dahlah tired w fasting then the worker & the machine r so bodoh & lembap & only know malukan org..if it happen to other pity then ..as for me...i fight back coz i know that im right & there is othing to be afraid off.they cant even aswer me what the purpose of making body check..i want anwer & Y should i to ben treated like that.u dont hv authorize to do so & i speaking all the time w this p[eople..depa ckp malay i answer in eng..still there is no anwer for that..please..like i wanna steal anything there..i not dumb..kena depa...

>>went to the biggest bus station there coz this student need to buy ticket.i bring her coz what the heck im going to buy ticket for u...buy ur own..

>>i dont hv the net room key & i hated it when i need to rely on people for it..if i've my pc..my broadband..i wouldnt ask for that kay..MUST GET A broadband connection,a fixed line & a laptop by next year...hated to tagih2 from people..

>>today:my 1st civic exam & some said it was hard..COME on..i told u what go out for exam..u didnt read & it shocked me that they
# dont know/forget rukun negara..what the bloody idiot,no civic concious the student..i was liked so frustated...inikah anak bangsa ku...Y..Y..Y..?..
#they leave question blank thought i told them i dont wanna to see empty space..they dont luv themselves so i cant help them..
#they taking thing 4 granted..dont bother about failure @ success & it just irarted me..YYYYY????

i was listenning to my FAV radio & there r talking about the wish list..
>>I wish they can bg me some duit raya(RM),duit shopping,my gaji.. & sponsor me the balik journey..adiah me a laptop(brand NEW)& broadband connection at my room,pay my phone bill,sponsor me the flickr account& the list goes on & on..
>>my emo not stabil~i almost broke to taer yesterday while searching for braekfast menu..i was alone & suddenly i felt so syahdu...dont know..if dgrlah any lagu raya..sure..CRY me a river
>>still my back in pain..my stomach..
>>not going back this week..
>>hv settle my teacher assignment..& another one must submit next week
>>i still weak..Y lah so weak this fasting year
crave for the buffet..the M*D one~RM 18
cant wait to go window shooping w this teacher jogging..

i wanna the buffet so badly..
but they said got conflict w the halal things w the meat..
really?i didnt know..but i tak rasa was2 pun..i've trust on that...
so should i be them @ continue the plan..hahahhahahahah...
so far..i dont know anything about it..
im so desperate for the buffet..dah lah its really hard for me to wanna eat..
Y lah i told them..
HUARGHHHHH...
p/s:when i PMS..i eat..then regret..when i crave..i eat..then regret..i know im the undisplinary person..but its what i've to trade to feel good inside..

i hv back pain..
might be the PMS syndrome..
im tired..im in pain..
---------------------------------
no gaji dah dapat
depa said the gaji will in soon
but how soon?
jangan lah late @ after raya..
i need my salary...
im broke
i wanna go shopping
i wanna pay hutang
i wanna to save
i wanna to grin & smile over the paycheck over the paid i getting in response to the mental torture here
please be it in asap..b4 raya..i pRAY to U dear god..
------------------------------------------
got 2 student came to me asking me 2 ferry them
nowadays no more cute,sopan,gentle hearted miss adi..
i ask them question & what reason plus Y must i..u dont hv ur guardian,
but since this regarding block/hostel & im the chief warden there
ive to jugak lah look upon the matter
they ask me to ferry them today..
byk cantik..i firm & said cant today @ tommorow coz i've my event
what the heck nak ikut them..
so i suggest saturday morning coz i only be free then olus d nearest shop plus strict 2 person that send the outing letter
hahhahahahah
sapa suruh hangpa dok buli aku dulu..
right now im the samseng one
the brutal one
---------------------------------------------------------
dislike my KJ
dislike all narrow minded people here
dislike all the back stabbing
thank god..
i survive by the ocean..the sea..the sand & the marvelous places here..
well..u gain some..u lose some
---------------------------------------------
IM not at HOME this week..
coz i need to budget
coz gaji tak in lagi
dunno how to survive
but since i'll be pack next week so 've to be prepare..
cepatlah CUTI SEKOLAH..!!!!
cepatlah DAPAT GAJI!!!!!!
cepatlah boleh BALIK UMAH!!!!!!!
----------------------------------------------------
hated the teacher room
the net room was filled w teacher
the library full w student & malas nak layan all the mata2/narrow minded people
cant be back at hostel
so..here me at the lab..
dear god..do give me the strength for me to survive
patient to be cool
sanity to control
& let me be in peace..let me be ME!!
-----------------------------------------------------
there r some good
some r suck people here at camp
some r in the middle
some r satu kepala(be a while then gone)
some r so kind
some r back stabbing
some r so bagus sangat to its extend of mind
ari nie i get irrated w the people..
bosan..bosan..bosan..
--------------------------------------------------------

the way ur dress is been supervise..gosh! i hated typical malay mentally..all the makcik & the teacher who r so kampung @ cant accept new idea..
depa sini back stabbing behind..well what do u expect ...so
if im not around at teacher room..i just dont want to be so closed w u narrow minded people
if i just there to ask question @ make myself bz w my things..well u make me do it..
i just can understand this people...geramnya...
im different..im unique..i confident upon mself..im hyperactive..im brilliant..im smart..im pretty..
im gorgeous...im kind hearted & im a revenge person..
taklah..my be coz im all the above so..all the makcik2 here r so ketinggalan zaman,so kuno..so old malay..so bored living creature..
TOLD MYSELF!!!
came here to work..to educated..to be pay..to get permanent job..to be secure in life..
to hv new experience..to kumpul duit..to be a better person..to ENJOY myself..to BE myself..
so..what the heck about them yg so narrow isnt..
need to told myself that repeatly coz im totally sick w them....
gosh!..patient my dear..u R UNIQUE & there must be reason u been sending here...
NOW..SMILE!..get a live!..pedulikan them..stay at place yg less people as u dont like them to see u like never seen people..

late to school today ..2 min late..
HUARGHHHH....
bantai pakai jubah & rush to school..
Y tak sedar langsung..guess it the rain..me hated myself for this...
being late..being oversleep & didnt do job
left me ROOM terrible messy
didnt wash clothes
me hated also me sleep a lot.
[2day me sleep from 1pm till 430pm,huarghhhhh..couldnt realize how me can sleep like that]
normally me didnt take nap but this fasting month
>>make me so weak that me couldnt do anything else but sleep
>>me tak larat nak drive pun..so stay in room & sleep~~only wash clothes at night due to energy safe~~
>>the net room was totally full due to all hv to do same assignment~~HUARGHH..no privacy for surfing
>>at school me look for lab,the net room,the library & the teacher room for COOL place...dunno..here at camp me dying wout air condition(me LUV net so much..fully air condition..so comfort)

me should be grateful..me should remind me self about that..
>>this week me totally punch card & buang masa at school coz
~no class.student exam.me exam next week..so this week me punch card..go teacher room for a while..then go for internet..then sleep....
GOSH!!be thankful dear!

"My Favorite Things":
...bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
Brown paper packages tied up with strings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Cream-colored ponies and crisp apple strudels
Doorbells and sleighbells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things...
When the dog bites,
when the bee stings,
when I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things and
then I don't feel so bad.

when im not infront pc..i dont know what i suppose/no idea to write
yet
when i far from pc & the intenet..the idea came mencurah2...
now..im blur ..dont know what to write here..so just ramble..

so i got this from reading a blog..kinda funny yet intelectual thing actually:
Positive thinking
A nice little nugget hit my mailbox this morning; made me smile. Good to share:
Positive thinking is like this....
A little bird flies up in the sky;you look up and it shits in your eye...But if you don't mind and you don't cry..... you thank God that elephants don't fly.....

reallyhungry for these~cheap & satisfying but very bad for diet

You Are 20 Years Old

Under 12: You are a kid at heart. You still have an optimistic life view - and you look at the world with awe. 13-19: You are a teenager at heart. You question authority and are still trying to find your place in this world. 20-29: You are a twentysomething at heart. You feel excited about what's to come... love, work, and new experiences. 30-39: You are a thirtysomething at heart. You've had a taste of success and true love, but you want more! 40+: You are a mature adult. You've been through most of the ups and downs of life already. Now you get to sit back and relax.

What Age Do You Act?

Your Power Color Is Indigo

At Your Highest: You are on a fast track to success - and others believe in you. At Your Lowest: You require a lot of attention and praise. In Love: You see people as how you want them to be, not as how they are. How You're Attractive: You're dramatic flair makes others see you as mysterious and romantic. Your Eternal Question: "Does This Work Into My Future Plans?"

What's Your Power Color?

---------------------------------------------
what is indigo?
red would be much correct @ yellow @ orange @ black..

Your Ideal Relationship is Serious Dating

You're not ready to go walking down the aisle. But you may be ready in a couple of years. You prefer to date one on one, with a commitment. And while chemistry is important, so is compatibility.

What's Your Ideal Relationship?

-----------------------------------------------
THE REASON Yim so YOUNG..
there a lot of life that i hvnt explore yet
i still hv the pain from the past
wanna to ENJOY life while still can
like people but people dont know/dont response
hated people but people r stupid to know..

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free. In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you. You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy. You would be forced to break up with someone who was insecure and in constant need of reassurance. Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

-----------------------------------------------------
macam betul je..hehehhehe
>>>You are afraid of marriage
>>>In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now
>>>Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.& all this were being view by just pick ur fav animal

Your Brain's Pattern

Your mind is a multi dimensional wonderland, with many layers. You're the type that always has multiple streams of though going. And you can keep these thoughts going at any time. You're very likely to be engaged in deep thought - and deep conversation.

What Pattern Is Your Brain?

How You Life Your Life

You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside. You tend to avoid confrontation and stay away from sticky situations. You prefer a variety of friends and tend to change friends quickly. You tend to dream big, but you worry that your dreams aren't attainable.

How Do You Live Your Life?